Children's writing: The Iron Man (using adverbs) - by Hannah

Wow! This is a powerful piece of writing, Hannah. It is packed with excellent verb choices and adverbs to go with them (e.g., slowly, painfully burning). You have skillfully used repetition of certain words to create atmosphere and tension, and you paint a picture of the Iron Man as being broken and destroyed; your word choices, and how you choose to add them in the sentence, create mood and emotion.

A brilliant piece of writing and thank you so much for sharing it.

Let's read ...

The Iron Man

As he looked into the dark abyss he tipped, then… he fell to the bottom of the cliff and as he did he whispered his last words, “Goodbye cruel fate.”

He was know as a monster taller than a beast  but now he looked  like a mouse small and timid. He went crashing, tumbling ,cracking and slowly , painfully burning to pieces. He used to be a kind, friendly monster but now he was nothing. Pieces of his rusty chest laid clattering at the bottom. But. But we will remember his sparkling eyes curious and tender, and his hands which cared for every animal and human who ever lived on Earth.

He was a mythical creature now he is only a legend told to children.

-ends-